We all have the option to be who we want to be, even at times when it seems to be the opposite. You can start by creating the best version of yourself and deliberately and intentionally choosing to become it, today.
You have way more power over your life than you can ever imagine. Take back this power by creating the person you decide to be. Here I tell you how.
The two wolves’ tale
There’s a short tale on the internet that goes like this:
A young Cherokee boy is brought before the tribal elders, who are concerned about his aggressive tendencies. One of the elders takes the young man aside and tells him that his anger is understandable, since all humans have within them two wolves.
One wolf is good and peaceable, and the other is evil and angry. The two wolves are in constant battle with one another, since neither is powerful enough to destroy the other.
The young man asks the elder "But if they are of equal power, which wolf will win?" And the elder replies, "The one you feed the most."
A young Cherokee boy is brought before the tribal elders, who are concerned about his aggressive tendencies. One of the elders takes the young man aside and tells him that his anger is understandable, since all humans have within them two wolves.
One wolf is good and peaceable, and the other is evil and angry. The two wolves are in constant battle with one another, since neither is powerful enough to destroy the other.
The young man asks the elder "But if they are of equal power, which wolf will win?" And the elder replies, "The one you feed the most."
All humans have within two wolves
These two wolves I talk about are like personalities or alter egos -some call it double personality. People can call them whatever they want and can have as many as they want based on their needs. This is no mental health problem, this is being human.
A small proof of us having at least two personalities, alter egos, or selves, is that most of us are not the same person that we normally are at home as we are at work.
Especially if we’re working in the corporate world, customer services industry, and even more if we’re in the entertainment environment. To work in these areas it’s very likely you have to select qualities and traits necessary to complete the tasks of those jobs.
I’m not asking you to take courage and be someone you’re not or don’t want to be. There’s true authenticity in this process. I just want you to identify your “self” by separating qualities and personal traits you already possess into two buckets -one that shows your true and positive self and one who shows your true but not-so-positive self.
A small proof of us having at least two personalities, alter egos, or selves, is that most of us are not the same person that we normally are at home as we are at work.
Especially if we’re working in the corporate world, customer services industry, and even more if we’re in the entertainment environment. To work in these areas it’s very likely you have to select qualities and traits necessary to complete the tasks of those jobs.
I’m not asking you to take courage and be someone you’re not or don’t want to be. There’s true authenticity in this process. I just want you to identify your “self” by separating qualities and personal traits you already possess into two buckets -one that shows your true and positive self and one who shows your true but not-so-positive self.
Identify your two selves
You can call these two selves as productive and not productive or best self and not-so-good self. Doesn’t matter what you call them. I want you to identify them both. In fact, it’s better if you use names or nick names to identify them.
Now, make a list of all the traits you don’t like about your “self”. Write them down in a piece of paper and when you’re done give it a name. The name is so you recognize when she’s upfront running your life. A few examples of not-so-good traits are:
My “not-so-good self”:
Now, make another list with all the good things, traits and characteristics you like about your “self” and give it a name. This should not be a forced or fake self. Remember, you’re picking characteristics and traits you already are, and feel good to be, do and have. Some of the good traits can be:
My “best self”:
With this you can get a better idea of how to make your 2 lists. Now begin thinking on all the good and not-so-good things about yourself.
Does your not-so-good-self not like to shower? Include it in its list. Does your best self like to listen to music and dance to the rhythm? Add it to its list.
Now, make a list of all the traits you don’t like about your “self”. Write them down in a piece of paper and when you’re done give it a name. The name is so you recognize when she’s upfront running your life. A few examples of not-so-good traits are:
My “not-so-good self”:
- Doesn’t have a plan for the day
- Walks slowly and with head down
- Cannot see other people because she’s so involved in herself
- Spend lots of time feeling negative
- Angers very easily
- She is jealous, envious and selfish
- When fear creeps in she creates monsters in her mind
- Spends money on all kinds of sales
- Buys things she doesn’t really need
- Wastes so much time in social media and the internet
- Likes to binge watch TV and videos
- Etc.
Now, make another list with all the good things, traits and characteristics you like about your “self” and give it a name. This should not be a forced or fake self. Remember, you’re picking characteristics and traits you already are, and feel good to be, do and have. Some of the good traits can be:
My “best self”:
- Has at least 3 objectives for the day and completes them
- Has good posture
- Walks with purpose
- Respects nature
- Is patient, enthusiastic and wise
- Is kind, understanding and forgiving
- Pays attention to those in her house
- She listens attentively
- Is creative and productive
- Saves money
- Spends money only on those things that makes her life better
- Sales or gives away stuff she no longer needs
- Understands all about emotions
- Knows how to manage her emotions
- Chooses who she want to be
- Etc.
With this you can get a better idea of how to make your 2 lists. Now begin thinking on all the good and not-so-good things about yourself.
Does your not-so-good-self not like to shower? Include it in its list. Does your best self like to listen to music and dance to the rhythm? Add it to its list.
Choose your best self
You have identified your best-self and your not-so-good-self. Now you’re ready to pick and choose who you want to be today and every day from now on. You do this by feeding or choosing to be your best-self most of the days of your life.
The best part is that these two selves are coming from you. You don’t need to pretend to be someone else. You get to be who you really want to be instead of just being and acting from whatever comes to your life and to your mind.
The goal here is that you pick and choose to be and act from your best “self” most of the time. When you do this you will begin to feel empowered and in control of your life because you’ll be choosing who to be and how to be.
Once you are deliberately and intentionally choosing to be your best self, you’ll be in control of your personality and mindset, and as a consequence, you’ll be in control of your life.
The best part is that these two selves are coming from you. You don’t need to pretend to be someone else. You get to be who you really want to be instead of just being and acting from whatever comes to your life and to your mind.
The goal here is that you pick and choose to be and act from your best “self” most of the time. When you do this you will begin to feel empowered and in control of your life because you’ll be choosing who to be and how to be.
Once you are deliberately and intentionally choosing to be your best self, you’ll be in control of your personality and mindset, and as a consequence, you’ll be in control of your life.
Transformation begins the moment you decide who to become.” –Nina Amir
Now, picking to be your best self all the time doesn’t mean you can never pick to be your not-so-good self ever again.
There are going to be times when you just want to let the other part of you come out, and that’s perfectly fine. Just make sure it’s intentional and for a limited amount of time, and when you’re done, go back to being your best self again.
Now tell me, what are some of your best traits? What do you like most about your “self”? What name did you choose for your best self? Let me know in the comments below.
There are going to be times when you just want to let the other part of you come out, and that’s perfectly fine. Just make sure it’s intentional and for a limited amount of time, and when you’re done, go back to being your best self again.
Now tell me, what are some of your best traits? What do you like most about your “self”? What name did you choose for your best self? Let me know in the comments below.
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