We’ve all noticed people that we just can’t understand why they do the things they do. But I think the problem is not so much on what they do, but on the kind of thinking that took them to behave that way.
Let me explain to you why people behave that way, why you are noticing it, and what you can do to stop paying attention to them.
Let me clarify this first. Being “stupid” is a very subjective qualification of a behavior. For what can seem stupid to you, might not be for others. With that said, let's explore the subject.
Why are some people stupid?
I strongly believe that there are different levels of understanding. Those who understand more, “see” more in life and in other people. Those who don’t, well, not so much.
Some the reasons for which, I think, people behave in a “stupid” way could be because:
We will never truly know why they do the things they do, but I want you to keep this in mind: don’t criticize and don’t judge because we’ve all been in that mode at one point or another in our lives. Some for longer periods than others, but we’ve all been there.
Why do I keep seeing them everywhere?
The reason is mostly because you're focused on that particular trait.
I mean, you’ve hear about that mental exercise where they ask you to focus on red cars, and when you go out to the streets you find tons of red cars. Then when you come back to finish the exercise they ask you, did you see any purple car? And you say, "uh, I don’t know. I don’t think so. I wasn't looking for them."
The reason you see stupid people everywhere is the same. If you are looking for the worst in people, you will find it. But if you're looking for the best in people, you will also find it.
So, what are you looking for? What are you expecting to see in people? because you’ll see it.
What can I do to stop paying attention to them?
You can only see what you are feeling.
In The Joy Scale I show that if you are feeling anger, or any other emotion from the 30 range, or any other range, you can mostly see from that vantage point.
So, if you feel angry, you will most likely see people, or yourself, doing or experiencing some kind of anger. If you feel resentment, you will most likely see people, or yourself, doing or experiencing some kind of resentment. If you feel optimist, you will most likely see people, or yourself, doing or experiencing some kind of optimism. If you feel happy, you will most likely see people, or yourself, doing or experiencing some kind of happiness. Do you see my point here?
My point here is that you get what you pay attention to whether you like it or not.
What are you paying attention to?
Choose a positive emotion from The Joy Scale and focus on feeling that way today. You’ll notice that you are going to start seeing more people feeling that way too.
Once you feel better you will be able to focus on their good traits and strengths and you will start feeling better and better with yourself, with life, and with others.
Remember, what you see in others, is a reflection of you. You are seeing you in them.
So, what do you want to “see”?