We are not always happy and I’m totally sure it was not intended to always be that way; although I think it was intended to be that way most of the time.
Human nature is to go through a range of positive and negative emotions all day every day. But you decide which emotions you want to spend more of your day in.
If most of your day is spent in being depressed, sad, angry or anxious, and you would like to begin feeling positive, optimist and happier most of the day instead, there a few steps I recommend you to follow:
- Decide to do something. Decide you are ready for a happier life whether you feel you deserve it or not. Your life will never change until you want to, and nothing will ever happen until you make a decision.
- Find a way to describe how you feel. Go to the Joy Scale and find the range of emotions in which you feel you’re spending most of your time in. If you feel depressed most of the time, you are living in zero. If you are living angry most of the time, you are living in a 20. If you are living worried most of the time, you are living in a 30.
- Find your top 3 issues. Pinpoint the 3 main reasons you feel are the reasons why you have been feeling that way and cause you to live in that range of emotions. Try to make this time as brief as possible. People are usually depressed because they are doing something they don’t want to do or they are not doing something they want to do or both. Either way is energy focused on the wrong spot. So, pay attention to where you are putting your attention to.
- How do you want to feel? Find a feeling you would like to feel and make a list of things that will bring you to that feeling. Go to the Joy Scale again and find an emotion or range of emotions you would like to feel. Focus on that emotion or emotions you desire and find things to do, or to be or to have that will help you live in that emotional range. Make a list of at least 3 of those things. Whenever you feel you are in the emotions between zero and 50, go to your list and do one or more activities from there to help you feel better. Make sure you keep this in mind when you interact with others especially if they don’t bring the best out of you. Remember, you’re always in control of you.
- Find solutions. Brainstorm ideas to find optimal solutions to your 3 main reasons. Once, and only once you feel better, even if for a few moments, find ways and ideas to solve the problems or issues that caused you to live in the negative emotions range. You’ll see that little by little you are going to see more opportunities to solve those problems and you are going to feel even more empowered and happier.
- Celebrate! Once you have noticed that you feel better and more in control of your life celebrate for at least 15 minutes. Doesn't have to be anything big. Even the smallest thing that can help you give closure to the task you just completed will do. All I want is for you to have the accomplishment marked in your memory so when time passes you have the feeling of improvement well defined. You can choose to have a 15 minute walk, 15 minutes of conscious breathing, 15 minutes writing of how happy you feel, 15 minutes cooking your favorite dish, 15 minutes talking to you favorite person, 15 minutes of me-time, you get the idea. Just celebrate.
Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." -Mahatma Gandhi
What things do you usually do to help you stay in a positive emotion most of the day? Please share it in the comments below.
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Thank you,
Thank you,
Related Posts:
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What Does Loving Yourself Even Mean?
Choose Your Thoughts Wisely
9 Ways To Calm Your Mind
If You’re Going To Love Someone, Love Yourself First
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