6 Steps to Begin Living a Happier Life

10/4/2016

We are not always happy and I’m totally sure it was not intended to always be that way; although I think it was intended to be that way most of the time.

Human nature is to go through a range of positive and negative emotions all day every day. But you decide which emotions you want to spend more of your day in.

If most of your day is spent in being depressed, sad, angry or anxious, and you would like to begin feeling positive, optimist and happier most of the day instead, there a few steps I recommend you to follow:

Decide to do something. Decide you are ready for a happier life whether you feel you deserve it or not. Your life will never change until you want to, and nothing will ever happen until you make a decision.
Find a way to describe how you feel. Go to the Joy Scale and find the range of emotions in which you feel you’re spending most of your time in. If you feel depressed most of the time, you are living in zero. If you are living angry most of the time, you are living in a 20. If you are living worried most of the time, you are living in a 30.
Find your top 3 issues. Pinpoint the 3 main reasons you feel are the reasons why you have been feeling that way and cause you to live in that range of emotions. Try to make this time as brief as possible. People are usually depressed because they are doing something they don’t want to do or they are not doing something they want to do or both. Either way is energy focused on the wrong spot. So, pay attention to where you are putting your attention to.
How do you want to feel? Find a feeling you would like to feel and make a list of things that will bring you to that feeling. Go to the Joy Scale again and find an emotion or range of emotions you would like to feel. Focus on that emotion or emotions you desire and find things to do, or to be or to have that will help you live in that emotional range. Make a list of at least 3 of those things. Whenever you feel you are in the emotions between zero and 50, go to your list and do one or more activities from there to help you feel better. Make sure you keep this in mind when you interact with others especially if they don’t bring the best out of you. Remember, you’re always in control of you.
Find solutions. Brainstorm ideas to find optimal solutions to your 3 main reasons. Once, and only once you feel better, even if for a few moments, find ways and ideas to solve the problems or issues that caused you to live in the negative emotions range. You’ll see that little by little you are going to see more opportunities to solve those problems and you are going to feel even more empowered and happier.
Celebrate! Once you have noticed that you feel better and more in control of your life celebrate for at least 15 minutes. Doesn't have to be anything big. Even the smallest thing that can help you give closure to the task you just completed will do. All I want is for you to have the accomplishment marked in your memory so when time passes you have the feeling of improvement well defined. You can choose to have a 15 minute walk, 15 minutes of conscious breathing, 15 minutes writing of how happy you feel, 15 minutes cooking your favorite dish, 15 minutes talking to you favorite person, 15 minutes of me-time, you get the idea. Just celebrate.

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." -Mahatma Gandhi

What things do you usually do to help you stay in a positive emotion most of the day? Please share it in the comments below.

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Thank you,

Image credit: www.123rf.com/profile_stephaniezieber

18 Comments

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Lore Raymond

10/5/2016 03:08:20 am

Appreciating the JOY SCALE! I sure need it today to move my vibration up, up, up! Yesterday was the 13th anniversary of my daddy's transition. That's what I wrote about in my blog post.

Claudia LeBaron Islas

10/5/2016 09:26:44 pm

I'm so glad you found it useful while going through the sad emotions of remembering your late father. I'm even happier that the steps worked for you. Thank you so much for letting me know, Lore ;)

Peggy link

10/5/2016 04:43:20 am

What a great article Claudia! With current challenges at work, this was meant for me to read today. Especially this, "Remember, you’re always in control of you." :-) What I find is that I need to take a few more daily breaks. Yesterday, after back to back to back meetings, I went outside and planted 50 tulip bulbs. That was a wonderful de-stressor and mood relief!

10/5/2016 09:31:59 pm

I'm glad you read this post today when you needed it. Now you know what to do for the next time. Planting 50 tulip bulbs!! That is a wonderful de-stressor for sure. I would love to see those flowers when they bloom. Thank you Peggy ;)

Rachel

10/5/2016 05:37:15 am

What an empowering post, we can choose where to be on the joy scale, yes! I especially love the part about doing things you don't want and not doing things you want. With only little shifts in this area we can tip the scale to joy :)

10/5/2016 09:34:36 pm

That is exactly the trick. With little shifts at the time we can change our entire life; we just need to keep at it. I'm happy you found it empowering Rachel! Thank you so much for letting me know :)

Pamela Thompson link

10/5/2016 10:09:23 am

Hi Claudia, Thanks for sharing some helpful strategies and practical tools. I love the Joy Scale! ... To set the frame for my day to be positive and happy I identify 3 to 5 things I am grateful for and sing my "happy song". "I am so blessed, I am so blessed, I am so grateful for all that I have. I am so blessed, I am so blessed. I am so grateful. I am SO blessed." :)

10/5/2016 09:37:11 pm

I love it that you love the Joy Scale Pamela!.. I also love your happy song. Thank you for sharing it with us. I might even use it now ;)

Jan Deelstra link

10/5/2016 11:28:02 am

Claudia, Recently I sent a quick 'happiness' survey out to my clients, and the results are inspiring. Regardless of how many respondents answered, the split remained 50/50 between those who believe others to be happier, and those who believe others are less happy. Your content reminds us that happiness is a choice, and there is a way to change that 50/50 ratio! <3

10/5/2016 09:41:20 pm

Absolutely! We have the power to be happy and it's way simpler than we have thought or taught to be. Isn't that empowering? I love my Joy Scale. I still use it during those times when my emotions get to travel to the undesired emotions. Thank you for sharing those stats Jan, I appreciate them.

Suzie Cheel link

10/5/2016 09:31:23 pm

Love this Caludia and decide stood out for me .my heart whisper Happiness cards say: Happiness is the choice you have as you begin each day. Love the start of the series xx

10/5/2016 09:45:45 pm

That is totally true, Suzie. Each day we have the choice to keep thinking on the negative things from the previous day, or continue focusing on the positive ones to create more positive experiences in our lives. Thank you for sharing what your Heart Whisper happiness card says ;)

Barb Parcells link

10/6/2016 07:04:45 am

I always like to include "Laugh a lot, at least once a day." it's good for the digestion and you simply cannot feel miserable when you're laughing!

10/6/2016 07:39:06 am

You are right. We cannot feel miserable nor think negatively when we are laughing. Thank you for the idea, Barb! :)

Ruthie Lewis link

10/7/2016 03:52:23 pm

This was very well written, Claudia!!!

10/7/2016 04:41:47 pm

Thank you Ruthie ;)

Levi H link

12/10/2020 02:23:18 am

Great post, thanks for writing

12/10/2020 12:32:03 pm

I'm glad you liked it, Levi. I invite you to subscribe to receive my newsletters, if you haven't, so you don't miss anything I write. You will receive a gift as well. Take care :)

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